No More Keeping Your Options Open Bullshit
I’m at a point in my life where I don’t have time for meaningless relationships. I’ve dated enough men to know pretty much exactly…
Latest Posts
When It’s Okay to Kill Cats and Poison Relatives
My friend Julia shows up at my house the other night. “I hate my cat,” she says. “I should have known when its previous…
It’s Time to Burn Your Bras Again
I always thought bras were meant to keep breasts perky while we age. I honestly don’t really need to wear a bra, but I…
Santa Created by Ancient Humans Tripping on Shrooms
Now what do you want for Christmas, little girl? How about a controversial Santa creation story to tell around the holiday dinner table, perfect…
Winter Solstice/New Moon Horoscopes
The sun will ingress into Capricorn on Sunday, December 21st at 6:03 EST. The new moon in Capricorn will follow at 8:36 pm EST….
Dan Deacon’s Pop Art Dance Party. Get Weird.
For those of us who grew up on a steady diet of Willy Wonka, Peewee Herman, The Magic Toaster, and birthday cake, Dan Deacon’s…
Update: Not All Men are Pieces of Sh*t
My best friend once said, “Men treat us like their personal punching bags and 24-hour sperm banks.” I’ve also heard many women complain about…
How to Wrangle a Unicorn for Your Next Threesome
Every open-minded couple, an abundance of bi-curious women and, well, let’s be honest, every straight man has lusted after the legend of The Unicorn,…
“Push Pull” and the Evolution of Purity Ring
After a quiet few years, during which they toured in support of their acclaimed debut album Shrines, were featured on tracks by Danny Brown…
Your Horoscope: 12.8 – 12.15
“If you are silent about your pain they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.” Zora Neale Hurston There is a lot happening this…
Luxor Tavella Talks Shop, Blue Eyebrows, and Bohemian Life
It is a rare occasion that you will see Luxor Tavella without her signature blue eyebrows and red and blue smears spread out like…
Insomniac Relationship Revelations Vol. III
Insomniac relationship revelations are back with a new relationship and multiple bottles of sleeping pills I’ve blown through. In this edition, we’re going to…
What Does Punk Really Mean?
I was reading a really good article recently – an article about punk, the history of punk, and where it lay within the culture…
In Defense of Still Watching Woody Allen Movies
“My grammy never gave gifts. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks…” Woody Allen’s Annie Hall gave me and my sister, ages seven and…
An Interview with Musician Kjersti Kveli
I first met Kjersti working for artist (and former rock star) Tori Wrånes in a performance last year for Performa. This means we…
The Pseudo Communist Love Manifesto
“We can be toasters,” he said. I smiled and flipped over in bed. All was going to plan. Later that day, my friends…
Alexander Wang Denim Ads are Like Awkward, Pants-Down Bathroom Selfies
A’hoy, perverts! Alexander Wang has some ads for you to jerk off to, if you feel so inclined. In a series of ads starring…
Celebrity Perfumes We Wish Existed
I‘m the kind of pretentious girly-girl who wears perfume every day. It’s always Guerlain Mitsouko on Mondays, when I’m teaching undergrads. It makes me…
What’s With Everyone Looking Like Everyone Else?
In a time where we aspire to become strong individuals, the idea of voluntary sameness isn’t one that’s easily embraced. Being accused of copying…
Polygamy, Face-F*%king, and a Very Nice Apartment
“So you talk on the phone with this guy every night, and he has a wife and two kids?” my boss asks when I…
Full Moon Horoscopes
This week bodes well for magic making, great awakenings and rebel yells. This week has a full moon in it. On Saturday, November 6th at…
The End of Electra Heart
In August 2013, a few months after the last date of her continent-crossing, gif-inspiring Lonely Hearts Club tour, Marina and the Diamonds’ official YouTube…
#GAPPYHolidays with Sorta Kosher
Some of you might be familiar with GAP’s “Dress Normal” campaign, which means some of you might be equally familiar with Sofia Coppola’s series…
Feather Rib Tattoos Are My Generation’s Tramp Stamp
Two months ago, I was very much in a market for a tattoo. Not that I’m not still in the market for one, but…
