Drug Dealer Fashion: Hits and Misses

January 24, 2014 • Culture

Paris Hilton

Murderous drug lord and up-and-coming style star Jose Rodrigo Arechiga Gamboa (known in friendlier circles as “El Chino Antrax”) was recently arrested in the Netherlands at the request of the U.S. government and Interpol for, well, mostly the whole drugs and murder thing. As a member of one of Mexico’s gnarliest drug organizations, Sinaloa Cartel (just in case you were wondering where you were getting all your blow from), Gamboa is suspected of killing and hanging three men off a bridge in 2011, though it is not clear as to what order those events occurred. No matter, they’re dead.

Like most of his generation, Gamboa has – up until his arrest — taken full advantage of the whole social media craze, broadcasting his lavish lifestyle on Instagram and Twitter like a Hollywood celebrity. The drug trade, long known for its high-risk/high-reward business model, has certainly been good to Gamboa, who appears to be the owner of numerous luxury vehicles and more than his fair share of fancy loafers, not unlike, say, Kim Kardashian. Of course, the difference between the two is that the latter’s cash came from pandering to the poor taste of the masses via sex tapes and reality television, while the former’s have been derived from more bloody, traditional, gruesome means. Money is money, though, amiright?!

Gamboa, clearly trendsetter within his community, has provided his fans with an indispensible service: demonstrating how much more awesome the underbelly of the world is, all while generously raffling off cars, cell phones, and sunglasses to his many followers. International governments, I imagine, have been less than entertained, possessing an emotional reaction likely similar to a rich divorcee discovering photos of his alimony-funded bitch of an ex gallivanting around the globe on misappropriated funds (i.e. his money).

This brand of common sense-obliterating narcissism that seems to be the hazard of the times makes me long for the more quiet, discreet years of the drug trade, back when people like Pablo Escobar and Griselda Blanco lived their exceptionally lucrative and bloody existences in peace. You think it’d be enough just to do your job well, knowing that you were killing all the right people and shipping tons of drugs to the United States. But no, Gamboa, you just had to go and post that shit on the Internet, because you, like every other 12 year old girl, live for those little hearts, those Instagram likes. (Newsflash: They don’t have wifi in prison and no one is going to want that orange jumper.)

Anyway, Gamboa will certainly have his day in court for the more serious offenses. Until then, The Style Con has a few fashion bones to pick with this amigo. Herewith, we present Jose Rodrigo Arechiga Gamboa’s Fashion Hits and Misses.

 

Denim and Blazers

Denim and Blazers

Personally, I have never been a fan of this look. It screams, “Hey, I have a job, but I also prefer the blue-collar comfort of a nice distressed pair of jeans.” You’re a drug lord. I’m not buying this.

 

Chambray Cowboy

Chambray and Cowboy Hats 

Yes, yes, yes, yes. This is an absolute win in my book. The exquisitely rolled button-up, exposing strong, tanned forearms demonstrates a man who is not afraid to get his hands dirty. The hat plays into my American cowboy fetish, adding a bit of authenticity to an inauthentic world. Paired back with a gold semiautomatic weapon and you have the perfect combination of old and new, murder and modernity. John Wayne with an edge.

 

Drunk Parrots

Drunk Parrots

Always.

 

Pictures with Paris Hilton (See above)

Paris does not have the cultural clout she once had. If this photo had been taken in 2002, maybe I would be impressed. For now, it just feels like grasping for celebrity straws.

 

Skull Ring

Skull Rings 

Okay, we get it: You kill people. Everyone needs that signature piece of jewelry, but I prefer my fashion to be a little less literal.

 

Studded Loubs

Studded Louboutin Loafers 

I have always been on the fence with this look for men. Too gauche? Perhaps. Fashion forward? Maybe for a drug lord.

 

Hermes Belt

Hermes Belt 

A staple in any moneyed man’s closet. So timeless it will outlive your stay in prison, which will probably be a very long time.

 

Personalized Handguns

Personalized Handguns 

For anyone who grew up watching Romeo & Juliet on loop that summer of ’97, you likely walked away with an unwavering passion in your loins for Leo and a penchant for the ornate artillery everyone carried around in their tight little pants. Gamboa takes this to the next level, incorporating Scarface quotes, tiny skulls, and the colorful bedazzling my girlfriends once used on their Nokia flip phones from the ‘90s.

Note to the Sinaloa Cartel: Please don’t kill me. I’m sure your drugs are great and I am sorry for your loss.

  • AmericanCartel

    Lol

  • Ugly Ass Boy

    They’re Mexican. Skulls have different meanings down there.

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